Just as spilling means licking in fraternities at college, so crunching shall mean skullfucking under my regime at the picture house.
[Y]our toddler cannot understand the movie and must therefore pay a surcharge of £900 on his or her ticket, both for taking up valuable space in the theatre and for putting the entire audience on amber alert for a loud case of ‘the grumpies’. In such cases, a knowing smile and statement attesting to your child being "overtired" are neither satisfactory nor welcome. You will be ejected from the cinema post-haste, and your child will be fired from a cannon on the roof of the cinema through the icy freeze of outer space and into the heart of the sun.
[via]]]>The Baron of Fawsley, Lord St John,
Had a fine buckskin coat with a frt john.
He said, "It was guthven
Me by Viscount Ruthven,
Who thinks I'm a cowboy, or t john."
According to his calculations: 1TByte = 8Tbits
1 punch card =960 possible holes(bits), 12 rows X 80 columns.
8Tbits / 960 = 8,333,333,333 punch cards
A punch card is 7.375" X 3.25" X .007" = 0.1677812 cubic in
1 cubic ft = 1728 cubic in = 10,299 cards
8,333,333,333 cards / 10,299 cards = 809,140 cubic ft
and so 809,140 cubic ft x 12 = 9,709,680 cubic ft
(1 cubic mile = 147.2 billion cu ft.)
Glad to be of help.
]]>The old rule of 70% utilization accommodating an unexpected 40% increase in traffic is unraveling. At least eight times in the past month, we've experienced from 100% to 1000% sudden increases in traffic across many of our clients.
]]>Paradise Lost
ADAM: Paradise has arbitrary dietary restrictions?
DEVIL: They're really more like guidelines.
GOD: Incorrect.
]]>